All of Our Yesterdays
by iamdkscully
Summary: "You're wrong, Jack. I'm not the only one who gave up..." Missing scene from 2010. Why did Jack change his mind and decide to help erase their past?


**A/N: Part of the text in italics, mainly the beginning of the conversation between Sam and Jack, came directly from the transcript for** _ **2010**_ **. The characters are not mine, nor is the concept of Stargate, sadly.**

 **Thanks as always to my wonderful beta, Amara, for helping me make sure that I make sense.**

 **And, thank you to ShoeQueen whose argumentative Jack and Sam in her story** _ **Truth and Conversations**_ **helped inspire me as I wrote my own tense moments between my Jack and Sam.**

* * *

There it was again. He'd been ignoring the incessant ringing of the phone for the past ten minutes. Hoping it would just go away, he let the machine keep picking up.

"Jack, it's me. _Please_. I know you're there. I don't want to leave things this way. Can we just talk about this?"

He sits in the silence that follows her fourth? fifth? call today. What does she expect him to say? He was still seething over their last encounter and he knew that if he let himself try to talk to her now, it would only result in another fight.

He was done fighting.

 _As soon as he rounded the corner and saw her standing there, his breath caught in his throat as it all came flooding back. The "negotiations," the "conditions," the "compromises," and the final acquiescence to all of those smug bastards' requests. He bit his tongue and tried to play nice, but it was all he could do to get through her diatribe against the Aschen and her plea that he now help save the world that they had all so easily damned._

" _So_ _we_ _don't go to P4C-970. We don't meet the Aschen, then…what?"_

" _I_ _don't know."_

" _Let me tell you something, Carter. You want to erase your mistakes? That's your business. My conscience is_ _clear._ _I warned everybody, I threw up the red flag and everybody—including you—shut me down."_

" _I'm asking you to put that behind us."_

" _You're not happy with the way things turned out…I'm sorry to hear that. Personally, I like things the way they are. No more saving the world, just a nice pond with no pesky fish in it, and the single most pressing issue in my life is whether or not to get a dog…There're a lot of pros and cons to consider."_

" _Jack. I'm talking about the future of the human race."_

" _So was I."_

" _We're doing this."_

" _Let me know how it turns out."_

" _Our chances are a lot better with you than without you."_

" _Let me ask you something. What does your dearly beloved ambassador say about all this?"_

" _I haven't had a chance to tell him."_

" _Maybe he can help you."_

 _She started to walk away, then turned and grabbed for his arm. "You're wrong, Jack. I'm not the one only one who gave up. I_ _ **tried**_ _, God_ _ **knows**_ _I tried. But as much as you bellowed to them about your doubts, you flat out refused to listen to the other side. You refused to listen to_ _ **me**_ _."_

 _He let his anger push to the surface once more. "Because_ _ **you**_ _took_ _ **their**_ _side!"_

" _No, Jack! I didn't. I didn't take anyone's side! I tried to get them to slow things down, tried to get them to listen to reason, to hear your side of the argument. Daniel and I both tried but this, it was a quick fix, the easy way out. Let someone else do all of the work and we reap all of the benefits. They wouldn't look past that! I didn't take their side and I didn't betray you! God, Jack. How could I? I...I loved you!"_

 _They stood staring at each other._

" _I still love you."_

" _You_ _ **love**_ _me!? You're married to another man, Sam! How the hell can you stand there and talk about loving me!?"_

" _Jack…"_

" _No! You don't get to talk anymore right now. It's my turn!" He ran his hands through his hair and defeatedly they fell to his sides. "You never considered another option. You never considered_ _ **this**_ _." His arms swung out around him. "Things were weird and uncertain and scary and_ _ **you**_ _turned_ _ **your**_ _back on us. On_ _ **me**_ _. And, yes, you are right that I was angry. No one was listening to me, Sam. No one!" He turned and walked back over to the chair. The leaves had started to gather on the back lawn and he closed his eyes remembering the warmth of a fire and her soft blond head tucked into his shoulder. He sat back down and looked up at her._

" _You say you took my opinion to heart, tried to make them see…"_

* * *

He grabbed the rest of the six-pack from the fridge and walked out to the dock. The sun was about to set and the entire sky was lit up in color like Fourth of July fireworks. He loved it here, but he knew now that he wouldn't be able to call it home for much longer. Too much bad blood, too many burned bridges.

He set his beer aside to unfold his favorite chair then sat with a groan. He stretched his legs out in front of him, and stared at the sunset over the lake for a few moments before he closed his eyes against the memory of their last meeting.

He must have dozed off for a bit because though his beer was still cold and sweating in his hands, when he finally opened his eyes, darkness had settled around him. He pushed the chair back until it reclined further and he could look up as he lay there. No smog, little pollution, nothing to hide the brightness of those worlds that lay beyond the stars.

He was sure that Carter could tell him the differences between them when looking at the sky with the naked eye as opposed to looking through his telescope, not that he didn't already know. But, if she were here with him right now, he'd let her babble through it all just to hear her talk and see the sparkle in her crystal blue eyes once more.

He sat up and grabbed another beer from the pack. Damn he missed her. Maybe he _should_ just talk to her? As if the Fates agreed, the phone rang again. But this time Daniel's voice rang out through the open windows begging him to please talk to Sam and make things right. How? She wasn't his anymore, never was really. They'd never made any commitments beyond leaving things in that damn room. She'd never believe him now if he told her the truth, that he had seen this whole new world idea as a kind of blessing for them both. No more jumping through the gate and fighting baddies on a moment's notice. No more Colonel and Major. A chance for them to find out just who Jack and Sam were and if they could work together as well personally as they had professionally. They were the silver lining to a very, very, dark and oppressive cloud, the only good he could see to come from selling themselves out for a chance to beat the Goa'uld. But that wasn't the only thing that had him upset.

* * *

" _You know, they say that politics makes strange bedfellows."_

 _He may as well as slapped her across the face. "I can't believe…"_

" _What? You can't believe I would go there? C'mon Sam. Do you really believe that I am_ _ **that**_ _noble? That it's the fate of the world that has had me up in arms all this time? You're a genius, remember." He literally bit down on his tongue at that moment to keep himself from saying anything else and giving her a chance to reply._

 _Her voice shook slightly. "What are you saying?"_

" _What am I saying? God, Sam do I really need to spell this out? Y.O.U. Okay! I'm pissed because in the end, you decided that I wasn't enough."_

 _She stood there shell shocked._

 _"You say you took my opinion to heart, tried to make the others see my point of view. And once you realized there was no going back, you tried to slow things down, make them pay attention to detail, question themselves? Why? Because you jumped on board, didn't you? Don't go down with the sinking ship, eh_ _ **Major**_ _? I was dismissed as soon as the tide turned but I never, never thought it would be by you._

 _"I'm sorry. I hope you can believe that, Jack. Once you made your feelings clear, once you ran away, I just tried to move on. I never, never meant to hurt you. You are right about one thing, I do want to erase my mistakes. Will you help me?"_

* * *

The rest of his beer slid easily down his throat despite the bitterness of the moment. Damn her for making him rethink all of this. He knew as he made his way back into the cabin that he'd already made up his mind to help. He'd already lived his worst nightmare, forcing her into the arms of another man. No matter what had already happened in this timeline, if he had a chance to change things for her, for _them_ , he knew he had to take it.

So placing his hope in the decisions they'd make in another future, he met Sam and Daniel at the former SGC where they finalized their plan to erase all of their yesterdays.


End file.
